The Royal Wedding

Unless you live under a rock, you know that yesterday was the royal wedding and I am not ashamed to admit that I was one of those girls who woke up at 5:45 to watch the wedding live! It was an absolutely beautiful wedding and you could almost see the excitement in the air. Kate looked gorgeous in her Sarah Burton wedding gown. It was classy, elegant, and timeless. It was fun to get to see Kate stand next to her sister, Pippa. It is amazing how much they look alike! Kate then entered the long walk into Westminster Abbey…seriously, it took her like 10 minutes to get down the aisle. I could feel the anticipation building as William had his back turned. Luckily, Harry turned around and spied on the bride-to-be for his brother and was seen mouthing the words “wait until you see her!” Oh William and Kate. Such a great couple. You really can see that they love each other.
When trying to explain to my dad, and all the other clueless males in my life, about the excitement and hype of the royal wedding, I found it was best explained like this: It is a Disney fairy tale that has come to life. An ordinary, but beautiful girl meets a handsome young prince. The two fall in love, however he does not want to pressure her into marrying into the chaos of royalty. She is too madly in love to be with anyone else and eventually accepts the prince’s hand in marriage. This “ordinary girl” weds to her love with nearly 1/3 of the world’s population watching. After stepping out onto the balcony and sealing the marriage with a kiss, or two, the ordinary Miss Catherine Elizabeth Middleton became Her Royal Highness Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge.
Um, hello? What girl doesn’t dream of that? It’s like Disney, all grown up! And while the Royal schedule of events may have included arriving at Westminster Abbey, schmoozing with royalty from all over the world, and getting the entire Buckingham Palace cleared out, I did find a way to celebrate. Here is MY schedule of events on this royal day:

5:45am: alarm goes off
5:45-5:55am: lay in bed and wonder what I was thinking
6:00-7:30am: watch the wedding live on TV and wish I were there.
7:30-11:00am: go back to bed
11:00am-1:00pm: various morning routine activities
1:00pm-6:00pm: wear a plastic tiara everywhere I go, including the bookstore.
6:00pm-10:00pm: various college-like activities (IHOP, concert, ice cream, photoshop my face into a picture of the royal couple)
10:00pm-11:00pm: Watch the history of the royals on NatGeo
11:00pm-2:00am: Watch the story of Princess Diana
2:00am-3:00-am: rewatch the actual wedding. Again. In my crown.

So I’d say I celebrated in style. What did you do to celebrate history in the making?

Me and William...a girl can dream, right?

22 Days Left...

I have learned more in the past four years than I could have ever imagined. And yes, some years were better than others, but I can honestly say that each year and each set of experiences has really shaped me into the person that I am today. I have learned that I am better at change than I thought I was. I have also learned that I can be independent if I want to be, and that independence is actually very rewarding. I’ve learned that I am an extremely compassionate person and tend to take on the cares of the world, hence the Human Services major. Freshman year taught me that I can adapt. I can make friends and have fun and try new things. Sophomore year taught me that life throws you curve balls and bad things can all pile up at once and people are not a constant in your life, but God is. Junior year taught me independence. It taught me that I could be okay without a whole pack of friends surrounding me. It taught me that I am much stronger and resilient than I ever imagined. Senior year has taught me that it is okay to feel. It is okay to be excited and sad and frustrated and overwhelmed and nervous all at the same time. There is no right way to feel in any given situation. Senior year has taught me that time does not slow down, even if you want it to. You have to learn to roll with the punches or you will get left behind. But really, it doesn’t matter if you get a little behind. As long as you are still moving forward, that’s really all that matters. I have made friends that will last a lifetime and acquaintances who I have been glad to know. I’ve experienced late nights- some were spent climbing the roof of the business center or watching a meteor shower in the bed of a truck, some were spent having deep heart to heart conversations and crying, some were spent in the hospital, and some were spent laughing in the library. I have taken 24 hour road trips to both the mountains and the beach. I have filled trucks with popcorn, windows with peeps, and windshields with post-it notes. I have had an apartment fire and an apartment flood. I have been a Biology major, an Education major, and a Spanish minor, all before deciding on Human Services and Psychology. I have loved and disliked college. But with that being said, I will leave Elon in 22 days with a few regrets and a ton of precious memories.

Just Run

Have you ever been told you can’t do something, and then wanted to do it more? That has been happening with me lately. For the past week I have had a strong desire to go for a run…which would end up being a short jog. I know that with a heart condition and an autonomic nervous system disorder it is definitely not a good idea, but I still can’t shake the desire. I want to lace up my New Balances and just run, without thinking, without feeling like I’m going to die, just run. Unfortunately that is not going to happen anytime soon. So for now I will sit and think about running. Maybe I’ll even imagine myself running a 5k while I’m leisurely strolling through campus, working up a sweat and causing my heart rate to skyrocket!

Lame post, I know. But I had to vent. And I will update again soon. Graduation is in 23 days! YAHOO!
So now I will leave you with a horrible picture of me. This was freshman year of highschool, aka 2003, at one of my cross-country meets!

Beauty

Being a girl is hard. If you have ever overheard a typical teenage girl conversation, it probably sounded a little like this: (watch here). Unfortunately the nitpicking and self consciousness doesn’t magically disappear with age. As a woman, why is it so easy to see the beauty in other women and so hard to see the beauty in ourselves. I really do believe that a large part of being beautiful includes being self confident. So why is this so difficult? Why do we focus on the ‘my fingers are too fat, my eyes are too small, my butt is too big, my thighs are too fat, my bellybutton is too high’ kind of thoughts? How exhausting. For me personally, it is the easiest thing in the world to encourage other girls and speak of true inner beauty. And some days I find myself believing it. And then there are days like today. The days where you try at least 15 different outfits and find yourself sitting on your closet floor in a pile of clothes and frustration. When you feel like you can’t stand to look at your reflection in the mirror for one more second, and yet you keep looking for flaws. When you find yourself comparing yourself to everyone else. These are some of the hardest days, and the days that I really wish I could just crawl into bed, snuggle into my cocoon and magically wake up and emerge as a beautiful butterfly. Unfortunately, this is not a realistic option. So on those days when you are feeling the need to find every possible flaw on your body, know that you are not alone. Also know that you are beautiful. We all are beautiful in our own unique ways. But I guarantee you, there is something beautiful about everyone. So go youtube “Skin Deep” by Zoegirl and really listen to the words, or think of 3 things you like about yourself, and remember that you are more than the numbers on a scale, the tags on the clothes you wear, or the size of your pants.

Growing older, growing up? Could it be??

Wow. Things certainly do happen fast. At this time yesterday I still had absolutely no idea what I was going to do after graduation. Yet in a matter of 12 hours, things seemed to literally just fall into place. My friend Lindsey got into grad school at UNC Charlotte and a few hours later I found out that I met the requirements for the nursing program in Charlotte. So, after talking with the head of the nursing department and with my parents it looks like I will be moving to Charlotte in August! How crazy is that?! With graduation being exactly one month from today, things are actually starting to feel real. It is weird to think that I might be moving away from Wilmington for an indefinite amount of time. I have lived 21 years of my life here. My family is here. My friends are here. I know this city like the back of my hand and I love it with all my heart. And yet I have to move on, which is not to say I won’t be back. It is just strange to be growing up and moving on, which includes moving out. So many things are running through my head. Charlotte is 5 hours away from Wilmington. Will I ever go home on the weekends? Will I go home for holidays? Will I still consider my parents house my home?
For now I am just gonna stick with the basic questions like when can I register for classes or which apartment are Linds and I gonna live in. So here it is folks, growin' older, maybe even growin' up?

Hypocritical advice?

Life comes with many unanswered questions, so today I ask you this- WHY is it so easy to give advice to others and not take it for yourself?? Why Why Why?? This may be the counseling major in me, but I find it so incredibly easy to help others and give them advice, and yet when it comes to myself, I rarely, if ever, take the advice that I give others, even when it could totally benefit me too. Hypocritical? I guess that’s what you could call it. I do it with the best intentions though. So who the heck knows…just some food for thought.

Life Always Knows the Right Moments...

“There are certain people who aren’t meant to fit into your life no matter how much you want them to.”

I found this quote randomly a few weeks ago and it has really stuck with me. When I first read it, I sort of felt like I was being punched in the stomach. Wake up call? Definately. As you could tell in one of my last posts about memories, I enjoy holding on to the past. If I meet someone once, I try to keep in touch. If something good happened to me 5 years ago, I continue to think about it. It’s a blessing and a curse, really. But I have always found the concept of letting go very hard, whether it be an object, a memory, or a person (in fact my fear of abandonment could be a whoooole different post, but I will spare you the details). However, more and more I am coming to realize that I cannot and will not stay in touch with everyone I have ever met. It is not possible nor healthy. There are people who come into our lives, serve their purpose for a time, and go. I have a hard time with that last part-the going part. I think that I am finally starting to realize that it is okay to let people go, especially if they have already let you go. It does not mean that the memories you share from the past are going away. It means that this person has come into your life for a reason, and cannot remain in your life for a reason as well. In my life there are some cases where I have to be okay with letting go of some people because I am holding on to a relationship that I have valued far more than they have. And in some cases, it is mentally unhealthy to keep hoping that this person will attempt to fit in your life, when they have showed you no signs of trying.

Anyways, I know this all sounds like rambling and beating around the bush, but if you get nothing else out of this post, just know that it is okay to let go of something that isn’t there anymore. Just because it isn’t good now, doesn’t mean it wasn’t good then.