Not yet a local...

Welp, tonight I cried, for the first time in a long time. (Dad, I know you read this blog. I’m fine, I promise!) I had just left the movie theater, which is about 10 minutes from my apartment, and somehow I got lost. This was only the beginning. After looking more closely at my GPS, I finally pulled into my apartment complex, when said GPS, Delores, had the audacity to say just the wrong thing at just the wrong time. As I arrive at my apartment, Delores says “Arriving at destination. Home on right”. Technically, this would be correct since I did plug in my new apartment address as the home address to make it easier for me to get from place to place. But how could this be home? I can’t even find my way to and from the movie theater without getting lost. How can I be “home” in a place that still feels so foreign? In all honesty, being here is hard. Other than not knowing where I am the majority of the time, as of right now I only have classes on Wednesdays and Thursday, which leaves 5 days of the week to sit and do nothing. I would get a job, but I start my full time clinical hours in October, so I can’t really get a job for only a month. I also don’t really have my own friends here. My roommate is from the Charlotte area and is pretty close to home, and she has been great in letting me go home with her and hang out with her friends, but it’s still hard not having friends of my own. The few friends I do have in Charlotte live on the complete other side of town, which is proving to be slightly difficult with how much gas I am using to travel to and from school (and getting lost all over town). So, with all the being said, I finally cried. After Delores told me I was home, I sat in my car and cried for a few minutes, allowing myself to get it all out before wiping my tears and going inside. Now don’t get me wrong--I’m thankful for the experience, and I really do know that soon I will get to know my way and feel more at home. So for now I will just dry the tears, suck it up, and adjust.

Adjusting to the Move

8 days later and I think it finally hit me that I moved to a new city. Today was the first day that I was painfully aware all day that I live in a new city, where I know very few people and don’t really know how to get anywhere. I know that after a while I will begin to feel at home here and make friends. But for now, how nice it would be to be able to drive downtown and walk by the river, or call up my best friend and have her come over just to sit and do nothing?

Today kind of reminded me of a quote that hangs proudly on display at the fictional "Karen's Cafe" in Wilmington, NC. I love this quote because it rings so true and reminds me of home and the set where I worked!

My Week in Collage: August 15th-21st, 2011

My Love Letter to Wilmington

“Every ending is a new beginning waiting to happen”.

In a little over 48 hours I will be moving. This transition in my life is much different than the transition from high school to college (and I’d have to say that that one was much more difficult). This transition is just strange. Yes, I moved away from home 4 years ago to live at Elon, but this time feels different. When I moved into college, I knew I would be home on weekends and for every break. This time feels more like I’m moving on and moving out. Of course I will still come back to Wilmington, the place I have lovingly called home for all 22 years of my life. But when I come back will my bedroom still be here? Will my parents still be living in the same house? Will my friends be here? I feel like I will be coming for visits rather than coming home, and that is so strange to me. So, as a little send off, I decided to write my love letter to Wilmington, as my way of saying ’tah tah for now!’

Dear Wilmington,
22 years ago I was born at the NHRMC Hospital. 22 years later, I drive past that same hospital quite frequently. I’m thankful for the Wilmington winters; the mildly cold temperatures, slight chances of snow, almost definite school cancellations and delays, the world’s largest “Christmas tree”, and Santa-led horse and carriage rides. I’m thankful for the Wilmington springs; the flowers blooming everywhere, the chance to walk along Wrightsville or Carolina beach, and the Azalea Festival and all the traditions and beauty that come along with it. I’m thankful for the Wilmington summers; the numerous delicious ice cream shops, the beauty of the beach and the history of downtown and the riverfront, cruises in the Henrietta, the most amazing 4^th of July fireworks (which are best seen from the rooftop of the Murchenson’s building), the Sounds of Summer concerts, the hurricanes (accompanied by a fabulous hurricane party), and the many opportunities to spot local filming. And I’m thankful for Wilmington autumns; the relief from the heat, the Poplar Grove fall festival, the fall coffee specials at Port City Java, the Pendergrass Farms pumpkin patch, and the smell of the caramel apples and cider lingering around Kilwins. You are the perfect town, not too big and not too small. And as much as I love you I will not miss your traffic, the constant smell of sewer on Greenville Loop Road, the ridiculous and often pointless road construction, the smothering heat and humidity, and the crappy mall. I may be moving and leaving you now, and I may not come back to live here for a while. But no matter how far I go or what I end up doing, you will always be my home- the place where I have had my absolute best and absolute worst memories. The place where I met most of my best friends and the setting for my amazing childhood. So, this is not goodbye, sweet Wilms, but rather “tah tah for now”.

 

The end of one stage, the beginning of another...

I want to start this post with an apology. If I ramble or don’t make sense it is because I am exhausted and haven’t made sense all day (see previous post for proof). But I’m gonna go for it anyways:

Summer is coming to an end. In the next few weeks, one of my best friends will be moving back to school and I will be making the move to Charlotte. This summer has been weird. It’s strange moving back home after college. It was strange traveling so much. And it’s strange to be moving and starting new school. I wasn’t quite sure about how I felt about the end of summer until recently. But I have decided that I’m sad and slightly scared. It’s the end of a lot of things. After middle school, most of your friends stay in the same district and go to high school with you. After high school, things start to change. Most of your friends go off to different colleges but we all come home to the same place. Now that college is over, we are all moving on. Spreading out. Yes, there will always be Wilmington to come back to, but will this place stay “home” for all of us? The future is uncertain for a lot of us. I trust my friendships and I know that they’re strong, but it’s still scary to think that we are splitting up and moving on in different directions. The end of this summer signifies the end of childhood (yes, I’m aware that I’m 22 and ‘childhood’ probably ended a while ago, but for the sake of my point just go along with it). So am I excited to move and start nursing school? Yes, of course! But am I sad to be leaving my best friends? Am I anxious to see where we all end up? Yes. So here's to bittersweet endings and new beginnings.

Growing older, growing up? Could it be??

Wow. Things certainly do happen fast. At this time yesterday I still had absolutely no idea what I was going to do after graduation. Yet in a matter of 12 hours, things seemed to literally just fall into place. My friend Lindsey got into grad school at UNC Charlotte and a few hours later I found out that I met the requirements for the nursing program in Charlotte. So, after talking with the head of the nursing department and with my parents it looks like I will be moving to Charlotte in August! How crazy is that?! With graduation being exactly one month from today, things are actually starting to feel real. It is weird to think that I might be moving away from Wilmington for an indefinite amount of time. I have lived 21 years of my life here. My family is here. My friends are here. I know this city like the back of my hand and I love it with all my heart. And yet I have to move on, which is not to say I won’t be back. It is just strange to be growing up and moving on, which includes moving out. So many things are running through my head. Charlotte is 5 hours away from Wilmington. Will I ever go home on the weekends? Will I go home for holidays? Will I still consider my parents house my home?
For now I am just gonna stick with the basic questions like when can I register for classes or which apartment are Linds and I gonna live in. So here it is folks, growin' older, maybe even growin' up?