Monday, March 5, 2012

Starving the Monster

Today I heard something that really resonated with me. “Fear is food for anxiety. And it can’t live forever if you don’t feed it.” Back in high school, when I was having a lot of panic issues, my counselor once said to me “Panic is a monster that is taking over your life. And every time you don’t do something or don’t try something out of fear, you are feeding that monster and helping it to grow bigger and stronger. You have to stop feeding the monster. Starve the monster”. I always understood where people were coming from when they said that to me, but it still didn’t make things any easier. There were times in my life where I was sure that the monster had won and that I was going to spend the rest of my life in my house feeding the stupid monster. But luckily I had people in my life who were willing to help me and who were willing to push me to starve the monster. I found this e-mail from one of my teachers who helped me greatly through that time in my life and helped me to fight the monster. It said:

“I am sorry it didn't work out for you to attend the concert, but no hard feelings, OK? I have never had to deal with anything like this myself, but I know it is very real. I spoke with Mr. Walen today, and he told me something that I believe he told you as well. He mentioned that dealing with this everyday is like having a monster under your bed, and you either feed it and make it grow, or starve it to death. I think that is an excellent analogy, and I hope you can find the strength to begin applying it the next time you're faced with anything that you feel you just can't do. I'm hoping to get by and see you either tomorrow during 2nd period, or Friday, and I want you to also know that the visit will be totally on your terms. If I need to only stay 10 or 15 minutes, that's fine. I know I've told you this already, but I care a lot about you, and want to see you get well. I haven't given up on you, and I will fight for you, and I am happy to do whatever I can to help you.”


So whatever you might be dealing with, just know that it might get harder before it gets easier. And “starving the monster” is tough. But in the end it is so worth it.

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